Dear Jef with One F

How sweet you two!  You might actually "work" and by work I mean Bachelor work....you will date for a while and then break up quietly.

Thoughts as we watch:

I just wanna hold her hand till I'm 110 hahah  CHEESE ON TOAST!
She calls him honey all the time.....hmmm
He said the name Arie....thats gotta be bad luck....like saying quiet...and Macbeth.....

Thank goodness you are following you heart and not your.....you know

my heart is broken for him.  he has no idea.  he has been so sure this whole time
he is seriously jinxing it a ton

don't say the other guy's name when you break up with him
Bad Ben flashbacks!!!  :(  (Too bad I learned to HATE Ben his season!)
you can hear his heart pounding in the mike...so sad

I agree---at least she didnt make him go through the proposal...

they say thank you way too much on this show

what is up with the bachelors obsession with cheesey 80s songs?

Bad slomo walk :(
And why is ricky running out?  Emily has made it seem like she has no idea whats going on!


Arie to NC??  WOWIE!
Awkward journal moment

Why isn't Arie the next Bachelor HELLO!!!!  Foreign guy...apparently TOTALLY kissable....Loved by all.....Heartbroken and lost.....................ABC get it together!!!!

(although I kinda like the kid..and i grew to hate ben...so maybe its not a good idea...)

yeah i wish they would have showed more of Emily's funny.....cause she for reals seems so boring on the show Like serious SNOOZE fest!

is it just me or is Chris Harrison struggling with this one??

are they gonna make it???  for reals gonna make it.....??????
guess we will wait and see

Dear Bachelorette Fans: Movie Monday Edition

Here is a play by play...I'm writing this as I watch!  Super duper exciting!  (also...spoiler alert if you haven't seen it yet!)

Hmmmm....you want a guy with an edge?  Sean DOES NOT have one.  hmmm

Crying about Arie hmmmmmm foreshadowing???

Letter to Ricky from Sean  Really???  can we say PANDERING!

Dear bad awkward small talk conversations in the swimming pool  yuck!

Is she saying she wants to leave? She is leaving!!
Oh she is being a good girl.  Not gonna spend the night.
Is she going to do that with them all????

Dear Sean...why aren't you wearing shoes?  you should wear shoes

Commercial break...may I say the whole idea of the fantasy suite thing is RIDICULOUS.  I do not like it.  And not because I am a uptight old-fashioned girl.  Its just kinda icky....just saying

All these guys are so sure...they know there is 2 other guys right????

Jef with one F asking the tough questions...way to go!  (can you tell I'm a Jef with one F fan)
Is she still hung up on the family thing!!!??? Get over it sister.
He's Mormon and you are not....so they will be a little disappointed no matter what.  But they are still going to like you.  Cause you are a nice person.

I think he would be a good dad too.  He would be fun.  And he wants to be a dad...wanting is half the battle

Painting analogy?  CHEESY!! The sun is setting but we are starting a new life...SERIOUSLY??  ICK

UGGG...What are you wearing honey!?  no way!!!

She pictures him in her life best.
Aww what a gentleman..is she really complaining that he respects her???
EWWWW ANIMALS ON THE GROUND!!!!  PETA is gonna have a fit!
Dear Mormon Upbringing--"Bridle these passions" hahaha


No way you can swim with dolphins...in the middle of the ocean...where else would you swim with them
you should prolly talk not just kiss....that ends...no good!
she is going to stay the night with him wont she...she needs to send him home...its only about the physical for them

Oh you are so good with kids?? glad you think so...the jury is still out in my book
Not even going to give him the card

seriously honey you have a pickle on your hands
Arie's got your hormones
Jef has your heart
and Sean has your head

Your weird chopped off straight hair extensions...weird


Sean-Why did you come if you were so cynical about it???
also...you look scraggaly

Jef-Its the eye of London...you sound so fake too..I think you just wrote it and read it though
Guard and protect your heart...really Jef?  Also...you look hot tonight!

WHAT ARE YOU GOING TO DO!
No season so far has been this close/hard!

OH MY GOSH JUST DO IT ALREADY!!!!

oh good...Jef with one F is SAFE...deep sign of relief!

Cue dramatic music

my heart is pounding!

AND Arie...CALLED IT!

poor kind sweet sean!
you were just too boring for her.

What a classy guy
What is that horrible tweeting noise.  Is that the TV...or outside my window??/?
I love that he is sad without being all blubbery

is she going to walk away from both of them?? hmmmmmm can't wait

Many times this episode.....

ps...love my curly pinterest hair??  LOVE LOVE LOVE

Dear Emily

Alright...another Monday night gone...another review of the Bachelorette for your enjoyment.

First off...We all knew Travis The Egg Guy wasn't going to stick around.  He said himself he was in the friend zone. To all you doubters out there..ITS REAL!!!!

One of my bloggy buddies Bridget also watches and has nicknamed Chris Ice Age....UMMM PERFECTION!!!!
Check it out!

 

So poor little Chris will henceforth be Ice Age Chris.
Seriously terrible at the game things.

And while we are on the topic....you are in Croatia and are participating in Scottish games?  Weirdness  Disney affiliate ABC trying to plug a little..I think so!

Sean the kind and quiet is going up in my mind.  Very strong and appropriately "bachelor" humble about it.

Ummmm  Arie...up against a wall makeout anyone???? Way to play the game!!!
Seriously..he is doing his best to get her to fall in love with him.  I don't dislike it..but I prefer Jef with one F's approach better.  He's falling for her...and not worrying about if she is falling for him.  It seems more organic that way.  (and of course organic-ness is EXACTLY what we are looking for on a nationally televised dating "reality" show)

Ummmm EMILY.. WHY ARE YOU GIVING THE ROSE TO CHRIS??  Do you see how he is bobbing his head?  Do you really find him that attractive?  Are you CRAZY??  He is GOOFY looking!  And what is he talking about?  He is just jammering on and on  Can we say AWKWARD!!!!!???

Thick-neck (aka Ryan..have you SEEN his neck?  Its bigger than his head..which ps is FLIPPING GINORMOUS too!!)  Eww Eww.  You have been bugging me for weeks!  You has gots to go!
Emily-I was worried like the guys that you would fall for the salesman act.  BUT YOU DIDN'T!
But then you started to let him try to change your mind.  GIIIRRRL!  You had me all freaked out!
Thank goodness him and his NASTY turquoise shoes went a-walkin away!
Feel free to get fat...not fit into someone's "perfect wife" list...and not be a trophy!

Dontcha just love how he was all worried about the guys back at the hotel being all stunned and crushed..dramatic editing cut to celebrating bachelors hahahahahaha

And back to Arie..sneaking out eh??  There are only like 6 of them left...did no one notice?  Isn't that kinda sketchy??  Everytime one of these people sneak off I wonder..Courtney to skinny-dip..that one crutches dude.  Why did no one notice they were missing????
Again..saying all the right things to get her to like you.  Worrisome...  Not too much because I know you like her too but....

Ah dear Jef with one F.  You are so cute!  soooo precious.  like a sweet little boy.  sooo sweet.  this might be your undoing...but you are cute and I'm cheering for you.


And John...where the flip have you been.  Do you ever talk to Emily?  Go StL I suppose but really.  And whats with the grandparental funeral cards.  Your parents don't even know you carry them around...but now a nation-wide audience does.  Wacky!

Doug the Dad...why are you crying.  Its sweet that you miss your son.  But he is 12.  You are not missing his first words or his first steps.  You are missing his awkward pre-teen hormones.  Miss him yes...I TOTALLY support that.  He's your kid.  But he told you to come on the show (an odd request, but we shall move on) so stop blubbering.  Keep it together man!

Uh oh...who will she send home.  She is going to send them both home??  Is she trying to speed through this process or something?  Where is the fire?  Is your biological clock ticking?  You are only 26 you know.  And the longer you are on the air the more money you make....

And the dramatic bringing of the second rose!!!!!!!!
Keeping them both eh??  Well we shall see what next week will bring!

I think Arie and the producer problem will blow over.  She likes him too much.  Plus again..he's in island previews.  But I thought that last week about Ryan.  Guess they scrambled together all the "beachy" shots in Croatia.  Tricky editors!!!!

Doug the Dad and John will head home next.  

New predictions.
Still Arie winning
Jef with one F and Sean the k and q...its a toss up for second'
Ice Age Chris will round out hometown dates