Dear Word Misunderstood

You have caused a great deal of introspection lately.

Someone I trust very much told me that I am misunderstood.

And I didn't know exactly what that actually means.

My knee-jerk reaction was
"Heck yeah!  People don't get me!"
My next thought:
"Aw heck...do I even get me?

hahaha.  I think knowing and understanding ourselves is a life long project that is never really done.

So lets put me aside for a minute...and lets focus on everybody else and how they see me...who they understand me to me

I'm easily misunderstood.  I'll be honest..I'm CONFUSING!
I like Luke Bryan and Miranda Lambert AND heymonday and nevershoutnever.
My two favorite outfits: a form-fitting pencil skirt paired with a leather jacket AND a boho-ish print maxi dress.
I'll tell people who read my blog all sorts of things...but would NEVER tell a friend (not a best friend...just a friend hahaha...gotta clarify)

Lots of people see me as the studious, sweet, spiritual, got it all together girl.  A good little Mormon girl
And yeah that is sort of me....that toned down a lot is the real me.  You gotta tone it down cause you've gotta have some room to throw in some other stuff.

You've gotta throw in that I don't always got it together--just ask my mama ;)
Throw in that I want to dye my hair pink.
That I love black nails...that some days most days I'm not Miss Good-Little Mormon girl

And I don't think many people really know that about me.  And when they find it out...they act so surprised.

(warning I am about to throw some serious Child Development mojo all over this joint!)

Piagetian theory believes that cognitive development (our understanding of people and things around us) is based on assimilation.
The child sees a bird in the sky..points and Mom labels it as a BIRD.
Later the child sees an airplane and labels it BIRD.
It flies in the sky...so it must be a bird.

We see someone...and we want them to fit into our schema.
We are all the victims and the perpetrators of this crime.

With all the changes that have been happening in the past year or so...I have watched people try to put me in their schemas. They have placed me in their little boxes.

I watched one person fight tooth and nail to keep me there.  They didn't want to see the real Stephanie...they couldn't handle it in fact.
I lost a relationship because I wasn't the person he thought I was.
I have had people tell me what I was thinking.  And why I was doing things and making the choices I was.
People love to put words in my mouth and thoughts into my head.

They like to think they know me.
You don't know a thing about me!

You want to know me??  Want to understand me for reals??
Allow yourself to accommodate. Let yourself create new schemas.