Lets Share Some Memories-Its Monday!

Alright-so this is probably my fave Katy Perry song (don't judge....I really only like 3.5 of her songs)




A couple of moons ago there was this boy
(of course there was you say----be honest you would find this blog very boring if I didn't!)

It had been a while since I liked someone.  So when I met him, my young girl side came rushing out-and major crushing happened.

And I thought he might like me back.  There were a few dates.  Several hard core flirting moments.

And then suddenly--"the mystery of the disappearing man"
Not truly disappearing since I saw him from a far.  But it was always from afar.
And it made NO sense.  Of course I tried to solve the mystery...which ended SOOOO well!




I was flying high on cloud nine-excited and as one of my best friends would say "twitter-pated"

But I read the stars wrong

And then I came crashing down.  On the concrete

And let me tell you-gravity hurts.


But it became clear to me.  And I had to let go.


Did you see that??  I should I try to shove more lyrics into this post???  tehehehe


Point is-whenever this song comes on the radio-I turn it up and sing really loud.
And remember the time I tried to solve the mystery of the disappearing man

Be Happy Be Healthy!

TWBMH-The GREAT Wardie Boys

Since not much is going on so I am gonna pick up on an old series I did a while back.....
To check out old ones...Click HERE


There are probably a few boys who I will talk about in this post that would be terrified to know I was writing about them!  Not terrified in a bad way-in an "I'm so embarrassed" sort of way.

Most of the posts I have written in this series have been centered on guys I liked, or guys who liked me.

This post is a little different.  This post is about the boys I loved in the best ward I have ever been in.
There were a few that things happened with (there are some I've written about in fact)
But there were even more that TOTALLY changed me.  Restored my faith in a gender that had let me down quite a bit up to this point!

Most of these guys I haven't heard from or even talked to in over a year.  But I've stayed in touch with a few...and some of these recent interactions have really taken me back.

They have taken me back and reminded me of so many wonderful memories.  So many great talks.  So many laughs and smiles and adventures.

These are the boys who have made me so picky.  I used to say "Oh I'm not that picky"  Nope....I am!
Thanks boys!!!!


Home Teacher
       He taught me the importance of small and simple acts of service.  He was always there with a plate of cookies or a little note on my door when he knew I needed it

Big Teddy Bear
        What can I even say about this kid???  He took a little time to get to know.  I honestly would never have thought when we first met that I would sit here grinning from ear to ear saying "Gosh I LOVE that kid!" But he is honestly one of the most kind people I know-once he lets you in.  I feel so honored that he did, not only because it is such a rare thing, but also because it allowed me to see so many other sides of him.  He taught me the importance of letting people know that you care...not just with actions, but with words too.  They say actions speak louder than words, but that doesn't mean that words don't carry anything at all.

SuperFan
        Oh man---this guy made me laugh all the time.  One time the two of us had this whole elaborate plan to drive to Vegas at 9:00 at night ......to watch our Cougars play BBall in the tournament down there.  He was spontaneous and crazy and fun.  He was never serious and never not cracking jokes or smiles.  But he was a good kid.  He never let his attitude towards life stop him from achieving his goals and fulfilling his responsibilities.  Everytime a techno song pops up on my Pandora-I think of him and dance it out just like he would (in private though...cause he is the ONLY one who could pull those moves off in public hehe)

Newsie
       This guy is the ULTIMATE kind person.  I don't think he has ever been mad.  I don't think he has ever said anything mean about anyone!  He was the hometeacher everyone fought over-the one you were jealous of other girls for having.  He introduced me to Marcel the Shell- and there really is not much to say after that :) He treated every person like they were his family and he cared about them.

Gangsta
       Full of surprises!  You thought you had an idea of him, but you were wrong :)  He saved my BUTT at least twice.  He was flexible and rolled with the punches.  And he gave me one of the greatest compliments anyone has ever given me-he asked me (out of a dozen AMAZING singers in the ward) to sing with him.  It was an awesome experience that I am so grateful for!

Teacher
      This guy was the sweetest!  Always had a smile and always bent over backwards to help people and make peoples lives more fun :)  He taught a Sunday School class I was in-and it really changed the way I thought about things...at the time and now!  I actually just found some notes I took from the class...I can't wait to go through them and rediscover things I thought and comments made by other class members!

Peter Priesthood
       But in a good way!  Usually this means that the guy is not someone you want to be around.  But this guy...he was a great great great kind guy.  Such a spiritual giant!!!!

Library buddy
       This guy wanted to change the world!  Inspirational for sure....even more fun to hang out with.  He taught me how to have fun.  There is a whole world of crazy silly fun to be had out there......  He also taught me the fool-proof skill of the "elbow grab"

Mr Responsible
      Seriously someone needs to marry this guy!!!!!  I have NEVER seen a guy fulfill his calling (volunteer positions in our church) better than this guy.  Kind and CRAZY responsible.  Ladies....he's going to medical school....Let me know if you want a hook up!

Great Hugger
      Best hugs in the WORLD!  For reals.  And he knew when people needed them to.  And he gave them willingly.  In tune with others needs....not bad my friends...not bad!

The Whole Apartment on the Ground
      The guys who were there through thick and thin.  Through my years here the residents changed but the attitude didn't.  They made us smile when we were blue-gave us hugs-gave us blessings.  They were the hot spot to go.  The place where you knew there would always be something hoppin.


There are so many more I could talk about. But lets just leave it at this.
There were a whole lot of guys who went through that ward in the years I lived there.
Many I was able to get close with...and those I was able to get to know changed my life!
They raised the bar that is for sure!

Good luck clearing it future boys   ;)

Be Happy...Be Healthy

TWBMH Part 6: CD Boy

Sorry for the delay!  I've been more busy than I expected...we will know tomorrow if I have anything to report from my activities ;)  Stay tuned!!!!!!!

Anyways..back to the Tales of Stephanie's Stupidity and Heartbreak  (too bad I didn't come up with that name earlier)

So there is gonna be a couple themes you will start to see with many of these stories.  This theme is first and foremost that I am very often STUPID and completely INCOMPETENT when it comes to boy/girl interactions.  The second is I overthink things...and then hold onto the slightest little bit of nothing for a disturbingly long and embarrassing period of time.

So lets talk about CD Boy.

Met in the ward...mostly from choir.  He had a pretty decent voice.  Anyway it was finals time and I accidentally ran into him outside of a big review session.  He ended up sitting next to me.  And---don't judge me---I didn't pay much attention during the review.

The first review we spent discussing music.  He discovered I hadn't heard several of his favorite groups, and was highly disappointed.  This led to a promise for cds the next day.

The next day at the next review, he brought me 5 CDs of music he wanted me to listen to.  REALLY?  FIVE?  I still had yet to be a big He's Just Not That Into You person...but I feel like that is a sign of interest.  Guys don't go to a whole lot of trouble if the girl isn't worth it to them.

With the music situation...a facebook conversation began.  We discussed music back and forth...and the conversation turned into a back and forth question game of sorts.  It kept going for weeks.  I looked forward to responses everytime.
Facebook turned into occasional texting--always flirty.  But did anything come of it?  No--does it ever?

One conversation almost led to me getting some answers.  (Remind me to tell you the background story of the conversation...Baseball Boy)  Anyways I mentioned that I was bummed about the fact that I liked him, but he for sure didn't like me.  He responded with a  "Yeah we've all wanted someone we can't have"  Then came a conversation where I was told that all the guys in the ward choir wanted me.  I told him he should exclude himself...to which he responded "How do you know"  He then changed the subject and no amount to persuading from me could get us bad on the subject.

I think he was just trying to push my buttons and get me all agitated.
We remained close for the rest of the time I was in the ward, but then I moved and we lost touch.  Honestly haven't talked since.  Years even.  Wonder what ever happened to him...........


Things I learned....
I can't date a super super liberal Democrat
Also...can't date someone who spends more time getting ready then me.  Seriously he spent at least 30 minutes getting the perfect just-rolled-out of bed spiky hair look.  I mean I do an on purpose messy bun...but I'm a girl!

TWBMH Part 5: Cheerio Boy

Here's hoping all these super long posts aren't driving you all crazy!
I have one blog that I follow that I have to carve out time for cause the author writes very long, very dense posts.

Hopefully this is still a light and fun blog and doesn't require too much thought or time!

So ready for Cheerio Boy????

Alright.  Met this one in my ward.  After a few months of knowing each other...he asks me to go to the climbing gym with him.

Important side note....I HATE HATE heights.  Like terrified!  Paralyzing fear.  But I was stupid and didn't decide that this was something to mention after the invitation.

Second important side note...if you don't want to do what the guy suggests, you have a right to say no or suggest another activity.  At the time I thought it would be rude...but honestly, going and being a moderately rotten date cause you are not comfortable..more rude!

Anyways, I say yes and we go bouldering.  It wasn't terrible, but not magical in the slightest.
He was one of those super eager types.
Guys don't bring up the M-word on the first date.  It rarely works for you!
He was a kind boy, but kinda weird and not attractive to me (he might have been to someone else...just not me)

It was almost winter break so when he dropped me off and said he would like to do it again sometime, I responded I would be pretty busy with finals and then winter break...then trailed off.

Third important side note: BOYS!  Yes you with the Y chromosome!  Are you paying attention?? vague excuses=BLOW OFF!

He said yeah we would figure something out.  A brave and courageous girl would have told him straight up but we already know this version of Stephanie was not very brave nor courageous.

He calls/texts me quite a bit that week.  I keep blowing him off but he just wouldn't give up.  Then one night I get a text asking me if I would like to go to the store with him...cause there is a big sale on Cheerios.  Yes that did just happen.  You are not dreaming.  And no I am not making this up.  You can't make this kind of stuff up!

I was hanging out with my cousin that night and told him maybe after, fully planning on being out "too late" with her.  While we were driving home though...guess who calls.  Cheerio Boy.  My cousin then delights herself by answering my phone and playing a very convincing confused girl.  I know...we are both terrible human beings!
I finally feel too badly about it and take the phone.  My guilt leads me to agree to the grocery store run.  He promises it will just be a quick trip, and I figure what is the harm.

And...45 boxes of cheerios later I am back at my apartment.  OH GOOD GRIEF!!!!

Winter break comes, and I feel like after 2 weeks he will have moved on.  Yeah I wasn't so lucky.
He waits a week or so, but right before the long holiday weekend in January he calls wanting to take me out.  But I had already made plans with several different cousins (both sides) as well as my sister that would pretty much be taking up my whole weekend.  And so I told him I couldn't go out.  And he got so mad!  He just couldn't believe that I wouldn't change my schedule to hang out with him.

To this day I have no idea why he thought he had a right to be upset.  One date and a 30 minute crazy trip to the grocery store does not imply a relationship!  But regardless I got ticked!  He didn't own me!  I had every right to make plans of my own!  I apologized pretty briskly and said I had to go...and hung up.

I figured it was all done and over with and moved on.  But the next night I get a facebook message.  Basically the long and short of it "I wanted something to happen with us but you were just not open to it" and "I'm disappointed."
I responded with a "Well no I actually am not open to it"   Of course I was nice and polite about it.  And I didn't hear from him much again.

Lessons from Cheerio Boy you ask.
I need to be more confidant and stick up for myself better
and just be straight up honest (it took me a little to convince myself that this could be accomplished while still being moderately kind)
Possessive...NOT ATTRACTIVE

TWBMH Part 4: Knight in Shining Armor

So in all honesty-this is my most regretted story yet.  I just was not super smart about the whole thing
But it was crucial in my "development" so I guess I have to tell you about it.

Let me set you up for this one.  I had had a REALLY rough summer, I was away from all my friends living with people I didn't know, and all my guy friends were on missions STILL!!!!  So I was kinda an emotional mess for like a YEAR

This emotional disaster was allowed to transfer to my dating life, and therefore led to some choices that were not all bad...but prolly HIGHLY ill-advised.

Enter Knight in Shining Armor.

 

 I met him when my apartment went over to his to interview them so we could introduce them at Ward Prayer (or ward stare as some liked to call it....ask if you care for explanation haha).  We chat a bit but nothing major.  He drops by later that night and somehow (I truly have no idea anymore) joking led to us suddenly becoming "boyfriend and girlfriend".  This joke of course continues for quite a while!

Monday night he invites me to watch a movie with him.  We chat through most of the movie and are getting along quite well.  Then I get a phone call.  Its my best friend telling me that her and a few others were at the hospital with another of our friends.  I am visibly upset and he gets this very sweet concerned look on his face.  They are talking about them coming to get me, when he asks if I need a ride.  He promises he doesn't mind and is already getting his keys and his coat.  He JUMPED up and didn't even think twice about it.  I was seriously freaking out, and the whole way to the hospital he is comforting me and telling me everything is going to be ok.

Its already midnight at this point, but when we get to the hospital he insists on sitting with us for a bit (despite my protesting).  When he does head home, he gives me a huge hug and my friends go crazy about how cute and sweet he is.  A little while after he leaves, I get a message from him saying that he hopes everything works out and that he will be up for a little while if I need someone to talk to.

The next day as I am telling my mother everything that happened, she warns me not to put this guy up on a pedestal, but do I listen....no of course not!  That would make this whole thing far to easy...and boring!
That night (magical Tuesday mind you!) he calls me up to ask me to go with him to the Haunted Forest Saturday night.  I, of course, say yes.

(side note...what is up with guys wanting to take girls to haunted things on dates......so not cool!)

We had a blast, and I, of course, am scared out of my mind!  At first we are holding hands for "protection" but we didn't stop holding hands when there was no more "danger" so...yeah.  He gets the award for being the first guy I ever held hands with.  Anyway, the date ended and I was a VERY happy, and slightly smitten girl!

The next morning I get up early to make sure I look extra good for church.  And he doesn't say a single word to me the whole day.  And its not like he didn't have an opportunity.  He stood next to me in a small group for almost 5 minutes..and NOTHING!  I was pretty upset, but made excuses and tried to create opportunities later in the night for us to talk.  (I hadn't seen He's Just Not That Into You yet haha).

He invited me and my roommates to go with him to a friend's party and though I didn't really want to I went along.  And it was TERRIBLE!

He flirted his face off with my two roommates who went (ps they flirted back mercilessly), and hardly talked to me.  When we finally went home I was FUMING!  I was mad at him and mad at my roommates who knew how much I liked him.  I called my besties and they told me I had to call him out on it. I didn't want to...but I did.

I asked him if we could go for a quick walk and we ended up at the "steps" (the steps of the church in between our apartments known for their power to make relationships happen...or end) I told him how upset I was and how badly I felt he treated me.  I didn't want anything to happen with us (not entirely true, but sort of) but thought I deserved more respect than he gave me.

He apologized and after that there was not much else I wanted to say...and was very tired so I got up to leave.  He insisted on walking me the highly dangerous 50 feet back to my apartment and a hug. I gave him a half-hearted side hug (did he really think I wanted to hug him right then) and I got into quite a bit of trouble.  He's lucky when he pulled me into a full hug he didn't get a strategically placed knee.....
And then to top it all off, when we get back to my apartment he asks if I'll get one of my roommates so he can talk to her.  REALLY??
He ended up dating her for a little while after that.  And then tried to date the other two as well.

A pretty stellar guy right???

I was pretty upset by this one.  I really trusted him, and thought he was really great.  But it turned out I was wrong.

So how has this changed me?  Well I'm much slower to trust.  And less surprised when they let me down.
Really I am less likely to put a guy up on a pedestal...which is really better for both of us!

I also learned I want a guy who will jump up and do whatever he can to help you in a time of need, no matter what.
And just as a side note...A retrospective lesson I learned...this kid was one of the "Smooth Ones"  Gotta steer clear of those ones!
I also learned I should prolly move a little slower (with both the hand holding and the emotional attachment).  Although I didn't learn this lesson very well as I needed a few future experiences to help me learn this one.

More on that later ;)

TWBMH Part 3:Taylor Swift Boy

I think this boy wins for the second longest serious crush ever. Literally we are talking September to Juneish. With minor relapses the next November, and then February.  OY!

Lets start at the beginning.  Taylor Swift boy was very kind.  Smart, pre-med even, as well as very funny.  Honestly looking back, prolly is at the top of the list of guys who were/are actually "perfect" for me.




We met in our ward, when we had callings that caused us to work very closely together.  We got to be good friends, and I started to develop a little crush.  But lets be honest there wasn't a girl in the ward who didn't.  Not because he was drop-dead, heart-stopping gorgeous..but he was the GREATEST guy you could ever know.  Plus he was a little aloof about dating, and that is always alluring to girls.

I've mentioned ward prayer before...and another tradition many ward started was the idea of nice notes.  Sometime around December I write him a nice note with Taylor Swift lyrics.  (if you haven't guessed yet..he is a HUGE Taylor Swift Fan)  I think I started with Our Song.....or You Belong With Me...I can't remember exactly.  Anyway it was flirty and cute.  I received another song the next week...and we went back and forth until we kind of ran out of songs.  With both of us being slightly knowledgeable of her music, it went on for a while!  It was a huge joke and we laughed about our cheesy sillyness a ton!

Sometime in January, I went to go see a movie with some old girlfriends and when I got out I found a message on my voicemail.  It was him singing me a rendition of Love Story, inviting me to go country dancing with them that night.  Too bad I was in the MOVIE!!!  The flirting and the joking and friendship continued and suddenly it was his birthday.  And what did I do?  I planned him a party!  I was doing some serious signal sending, but this poor boy was just so clueless...he had no idea.

Fast forward a week or so...and we are at Valentine's Day weekend.  We are about to head into a big event for our church committee and he and another guy are TOTALLY letting me down.  So I get kinda ticked.  Plus this kid had been flirting with me for months and STILL hadn't asked me out!  My best friend and I had had it up to our ears with the guys in our committee and our ward and went to the V-Day Dance with plans to dance it all out and not care about any of them!

And we did...and had a good time.  Though it was slightly spoiled by TS Boy throwing some trash at my head (it was an accident, but at the time it was infuriating!)  After a night of guy bashing and root beer shots, I decided I was over him.  Fast forward a few weeks.  I get a nice note with Taylor Swift lyrics.  (we hadn't sent one of these in a while)  WHAT???!!!!  Analysis makes us think he may have realized I was mad at him and this was a peace offering of sorts.  And I accepted it.

I was still annoyed and still feeling like we were both hurling signals at each other, but he wasn't doing anything more.  Until March.  I decided I needed to spend the whole day at the library kicking out 2 different 10 page papers and studying for a huge mid-term.  When he realized my whole Saturday would be spent in the library he insisted on taking me on a Jamba Juice break sometime in the afternoon..  Cue or first ever date....or was it a date....its really hard to know.  It was a half date.  And with this new-found encouragement I decided I still wasn't giving up yet (yes yes I know...I should have!)

In the next several months we continue to chat and hang out.  He is prepping for his MCAT and I make him muffins the night before (He like muffins almost as much as he liked Taylor Swift).

Then sometime in June we end up going on a walk.  Honestly I am totally spacing on the reason.  But we go and somehow the conversation steers to the fact that he hasn't liked a girl for almost a year.  AKA the whole time he has known me.  BURN!  haha

I was kinda bummed, but honestly it was good.  I had been holding onto this kid for too long and needed to MOVE ON!
So the next day my roommate and good friend/big sister burned all the nice notes.  It was a good release, and was very freeing.  Maybe a little overly dramatic, but what girl doesn't have a little flare for the dramatic

Of course he didn't exactly go away....asking me out for ice cream for my birthday (another half date, bringing our count to one whole date hahaha) and bringing me a super sweet card and sparkling cider as congratulations for getting into Johns Hopkins (he was so excited for me it was cute :) )  But I never really was hung up on him again like before.


LESSONS ETC!!!!
There are good guys out there.
Sometimes guys really are totally clueless.
Sometimes he's just not that into you...and you really should MOVE ON!
Smart, kind, responsible and fun are way more attractive than good looks
He was kinda awkward but not socially incompetent... definitely a good thing!
This kid treated those less fortunate better than anyone I have ever known....good quality
Though everyone ADORED him, he couldn't see it/understand it.  Lack of ego...nice!

TWBMH Part 2: The first date

Ok...so this is not a story I am necessarily proud to share...but I share it for the sake of my discouraged readers who feel they never get an opportunity to date.

So it is my freshman year.  I am 19 years old.  I go with my sister to her ward the Sunday after Thanksgiving cause I am not quite ready to go back to mine.  I meet this boy...Ice Skating Boy.  Return missionary, nice, not unattractive.

 

He asks me out for that next weekend and I agree.  I am pretty sure that I was the single most terrible date this guy has EVER been on.
Lets be honest I had NEVER been on a date before in my LIFE!

(Yes this is moderately embarrassing and again I am only admitting this in hopes that it provides hope to the discouraged.  But let me defend myself a little bit by saying that going on dates just really didn't happen where I grew up, so I didn't have much opportunity)

So anyway, lets just say I was DISASTROUSLY bad at it!  I didn't really realize it at the time.  But looking back...HOLY COW!  I would have given him a second date...but I really don't think he wanted to run with this one again hahaha.  I'm pretty sure he got married a few months later...so I didn't wound him at least with my terrible incompetence!!!!

I don't think I learned too much or added anything to the list with this one...just was good practice I guess.  Cause boy was I an awkward cold mess! (weird phrase I know, but hot mess implies I looked good and I don't think I did!)  Thank goodness I got some more confidence and some more practice cause I would be a hopeless case if I hadn't!!!!

I got one more chance to practice at a dorm sponsored dance, when Chauvinistic Pig asked me.
(note about this name...it was a joke between him and I...he was not really a chauvinistic pig!)
We had a good time.  I think I did better than my first date.  But it was so long ago I don't really remember.  We were good friends, so nothing came of it and that was fine with me!

Now I say I share this story saying that I hope it gives hope to those who like me, got a late start, and even after that late start still didn't get a lot of dates.  But maybe its not very comforting given my current state of bad luck hahahahaha.  But even though I have bad luck...it doesn't mean I don't get asked.....
I feel like a commercial for bullying...."It gets better"


Up next??? The terribleness of my sophomore year including Museum Boy and Knight in Shining Armor

TWBMH Part 1:The early years

Alright its the first edition of my Those Who Brought Me Here series.  Basically...I'm going to tell you stories and explain how these stories caused me to have the attitudes, beliefs, and ideals I have now :)
We all know that all these boys added things to my list--My list of things I want...and therefore the list of things I must be.
So here we go!  Again...Buckle up kids!!!!


My first ever crush happened when I was 4 years old (not too surprised are you hahaha)

Hometeacher Boy.  One Kermit the Frog "Get Well Soon" balloon and I was lost.  I don't even think I realized that our age difference of 13 years was rather large.  I got so many things while I was in the hospital and recovering from my surgery...but to this day (20 years later) the one that I remember and that matters most....that balloon.  I felt so special and so cool!

When I was 7, it was Lawn Mower Boy. (a kid from the ward came once a week and mowed our lawn the whole summer while my dad went ahead to MO to start working and we tried to sell the house)

At 8, the Singing Basketball Player (well lets be honest, almost the ENTIRE basketball team my dad was coaching at the time)  These boys were fun and kind.  They always said hi to me and made me feel cool at all the games we went to watch. They helped us move from our rental house in their ward, into the house we live in now (different ward).  I was super bummed to leave them.  The morning after we found a roll of toilet paper on the porch saying--"we know where you live"  Made us feel loved minus the clean up hahaha

9-14 was a jumble of older boys from church, "cute" boys from school, and celebrities.  Nothing really of any sort of substance.

At 14, I began on my (to this day) longest standing crush.
Choir Boy was idolized for YEARS!!!  I think I was 17 before I totally didn't have a serious crush on him anymore.  And even now I still think he is cute (he sadly got married this Christmas :(  )  He was an AMAZING singer, cute, danced, was very spiritual, and was nice to EVERYONE!

Then from about 17 to 20 I really didn't like anyone.  Not that I didn't notice attractive boys, but I was in a place that I didn't want to like anyone.  At the time, I had seen a lot of marriages and relationships explode and was a little jaded to the whole idea of boys and girls.

I had lots of guy friends though.  And they were wonderful.  Always having fun, being silly.  They fulfilled their responsibilities and always worked hard.  They had genuine concern for others.  They also all worked really hard and were really excited to leave on their missions.  Awww soo sweet!

Sorry for the blurryness---this was a gift to me after the boys surprised me on my birthday,
so I  had to take a picture of a picture hahahaha

So what have we learned from these boys??
I learned the importance of service and kindness.  The importance of helping those who are in need, and fulfilling callings and responsibilities.  I learned how important music and spiritual strength is.  And that you can be fun/funny without being mean.
Basically I learned to go for the "good guy"

Up next....first date time...stay tuned :)

New Series: Those Who Brought Me Here

I've noticed I have been talking about Chicken Boy a lot lately.
Farm Boy fiascos have brought it to the forefront of my mind I guess.

A while back I started to write the story
(for more explanation see THIS on the "old" blog)

I got into school, brother leaving, trip and wedding, Boy Next Door and then Farm Boy..followed a little bit by Clark Kent, and more school.
So point is, I never finished.
Now its Spring Break and I am just chillin home with the fam.

And I'm writing again.  And the story keeps going this time.
BND and FB both get some face time too.

Its a real soul searching project.
Kind of helping me sort out who I am, and who I was.
And how I really felt.
Its helping me compare and contrast the different aspects of the relationships.
Discover what qualities of the relationships, the guys, and myself that I liked and didn't like.

Something I have discovered.....
When the mere thought of  certain memories still brings a smile to your face even after it has been over for months and they CRUSHED your heart..that means it was real.
There is something about love that never really leaves you.
You may not love them anymore, but you still love what you had.



My bloggy friend Elise made me think about writing the story again...

So I think we are going to start a new series.
Since I have lots of time, and not lots of exciting going on this next week.

I'm gonna tell you the stories of the boys that have brought me to where I am today.
I could write even more about the girls...and maybe someday I will.
But for now---boys are more exciting!  :)
Plus it will shed some light on dear boys hehe

It'll be jumbled up ...so don't try to get your bearings in time haha
And it won't be totally complete..but totally honest and authentic.